After a series of heavy posts, I had decided to lighten up come what may, but then the highway cars remind me of John Denver, remind me of a home where you are there right now and my heart is heavy. :(… Standing near my window as I look into the night sky a lot of thoughts cross my mind. A few unwanted, a few wanted but not needed at this hour, and the others wanted a bit too badly.
The craving is bad for those arms around me, for those lips on my cheek of those fingers playing with my hair as I meekly protest, for those naughty giggles and gibberish near my ear which make me throw my head back in laughter, for that a bit too strong “chipko hug” that tickles me… I miss them badly now. Those playful eyes that make me laugh, those incessant questions that leave me bewildered and those innocent eyes that make me fall in love over and over again … make me crave a “rewind” button in my life – I miss you darling!
I read it somewhere and it has stuck to my mind since then, but I realized it only today that – the best gift your parents ever gave you are your siblings and that the best gifts your siblings ever gave you are their kids!
Escape from my mundane routine, the silver lining on all my grim days – that’s what you were all about – leaping into my arms complaining about the “poopy on the tracks” – nose crinkled, eyes round, demanding all stories in terms of Dora and Superman – you made me recall a lost childhood. It’s as if you’ll come running right now here as I type on my lappy, snuggling close, demanding a Dora cartoon and then as I oblige and want to hand you over the control, you refuse to make me realize that a little bit of snuggling is all that you need.
Painting your little hands with abir, and teaching doodh-di-bhaat-di on those little palms, the smell of you as I blow bubbles on your stomach, those mock screams – I miss them all. Your intelligence to cover up a counting blunder, or to smartly answer each Bengali dish with an Italian one during kitty cat (yes that’s what you named the little bong childhood game I mentioned above!) or calling me by that special name – is a memory that makes me smile even amidst a sigh! The baby fingers on my lips, those naughty little chides, those did-a-boo-boo moments, those swing rides, those car fights, those crazy camera moments, those dushtu-yet-innocent pranks, those mispronounced bengali ramblings, those all sentences that start and end with a “because” – these are a few of the things I need right now as I scream to each highway cars to bring my princess back … but alas! The next time is too far away Princess and right now without you life is as bad as “poopy on the tracks”!!! I Miss you
P:S – The title to this blog is what my princess always tells me whenever I ask her ‘kemon aache amar princess” (how’s my princess) over the telephone! 🙂